Those two plus one losing mind and slowly just sinking into illness.

Three hard, hard, hard, f-cking hard… hard.

can i say it was F-CKING hard to watch these three very beloved cats die

s=====l=====o=====w======l======y?

it was.

yarrgh.

and i never knew with any of them when to put them down.

one died on her own in the back yard.

don’t know if chose “right” time for the other two.

in some ways, those deaths traumatized me.

have two more cats now.

sometimes i just look at them:

please don’t get sick.

please.

one is strangely muscular and fat.

this worries me because one of the ones that died had fatty liver disease. fat cats vulnerable.

but doesn’t sound like your kitty has fatty liver.

did you channel info about cat?

ask someone else to channel?

suffering has such a powerful vibration.

every time it appears in my life i say,

“damn, i had forgotten how sharp you are.

between my ribs you squirrel and ferret.

my heart shears off where you enter

and leave marks before you leave and i

find it difficult to embrace you,

you sharp-clawed terrified carrier of pain.”

damn… i will send my best “heart-peace”

to your kitty. cynzim