what I secretly wanted

bodily functions Add comments

was a complete skin resurfacing treatment. I must have wanted this, because otherwise why would I be having one now? It surely wouldn’t be the constant pain, weird itching in surprising places (hey! did you know you’re completely COVERED with skin? Everywhere?), and eruption of hundreds of thousands of bumpy blotchy rednesses all over me? If in a few days it wasn’t going to start peeling off completely in a slow and unsightly manner?

So am I milking the whole scarlet fever thing?


Come here, let me breathe on you while I am still contagious so we can share this lovely experience together.

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5 Responses to “what I secretly wanted”

  1. Baby Island Says:

    OMG! jesus lady, I’m actually afraid to post a comment in case it IS catchy.

    Do you have a big sign on your front door that welcomes neighbors? Cause this might be a good time to share the love, no?


  2. lightspring Says:

    That’s an awesome idea. I’m already planning an impromptu open house.

  3. Janine Says:

    Look, talk to that smoking and talking new neighbour. Ring his doorbell wearing underpants. He will first shut up and than move out. Ask him to treat that cat butt with the white fluid, tell him you paid 100$ for it. He will ever be so nice to you.
    That’s the first time I am happy there is 6000 km of saltwater between us, Karen. GOD bless the Atlantic Ocean.
    Make sure you take care of yourself as good as possible – the aftermath of this desease oftentimes is worse than the iching torso: rheumatism, sais my cousin, who ignored scarlet feaver as much as it was possible, realy sucks … so please SLOW DOWN. Stupid thing to say to a mother: in other words: only do things that absolutely need to be done!
    Love, Janine

  4. LogicalMama Says:

    I have laryngitis right now (with a bad cold!) and had to chaperone a class trip today! Oh, and get a mammogram!! And I have a canker sore on the tip of my tongue! Each time I lick my lips I feel it rub on my bottom lip. My skin’s not itchy, but I’m with you…….

  5. Baby Island Says:

    Has the CDC quarantined you all yet?? Hope you guys are doing better!


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